Stoic in your Negotiations

Jay Burgess
3 min readJun 2, 2022

When you get into any form of negotiation, one of your most important allies will be your ability to keep your emotions in check. This is the one and only occasion in which it will be significant. If the other person detects any evidence of emotion on your side, you can be sure that they will try to take advantage of it by exploiting it against you.

The first feeling that has to be controlled is excitement. You should not let the other party know that you are willing to do all in your power to close the sale. Do you long for that stunning new sports automobile in the color red? Demonstrate to the dealer that you are willing to walk away from the transaction if the terms of the deal are not acceptable to you.

When you join a discussion with another person to play “good cop/bad cop,” this constitutes an exception to the rule that excitement should be avoided. In this situation, one of you has to be too passionate about making the agreement, while the other needs to put a damper on the entire affair. The trick is to make your adversary as enthusiastic about the process as you are and, as a result, to invest a significant amount of time in it. Of course, when the “bad policeman” participant declines to participate in the transaction, the other party is left in ruins. The time has already been invested, and the counterparty should consider whether or not it is worthwhile to strike a transaction at that moment.

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When negotiating, one of the most effective strategies is to maintain silent until it is essential. People despise it when there is an awkward pause in the conversation that lasts for an extended period. When you wait it out in quiet for a more extended period, you have a greater chance of convincing the other side to give in. Because most of us are used to having rapid exchanges when we talk to other people, learning how to be silent is not a simple skill for anybody to acquire.

If you discover that you are not skilled at negotiating, it is in your best interest to locate someone who is. You could know someone really proficient at it. In that case, you have the option of searching for third parties to whom you may pay to act as your representatives during negotiations. There is a good chance these individuals will be willing to do it in exchange for a certain proportion of the sum saved via the talks. The amount they save will be evidence of their competence. They do not get a payment if they cannot find any savings for you.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

You may become a more skilled negotiator by putting these suggestions to use. Nevertheless, the best advice is to have some experience doing it. Practice is the only way to discover what works best for you, and it also offers you the chance to experiment with other methods and strategies. Be cautious and pay attention to the opposing party’s goals if you let them bargain on your behalf.



Jay Burgess

I use data and innovation to help people and companies make better decisions. I also like writing about leadership. #BusinessIntelligence #datascience #ai